Harry Potter, Every Werewolf Has His Price

Title: Every Werewolf Has His Price [Remus/Sirius]
Rating/Warnings: PG-13 for assholery.
Summary: Sirius has to pay his dues.
A/N: Ramen_Addict and I had a conversation about how the Trick probably isn’t as earth shattering as we all act like it is.

Every Werewolf Has His Price

Remus Lupin blinked his eyes open, taking in the familiar sight of the infirmary, the familiar feel of starchy sheets crinkling underneath him.

“You awake finally?”

Remus turned his head slightly to see Sirius Black slouching hostilely in a chair beside his bed, arms crossed and peering through his too-long hair defiantly.

“Took you long enough,” Sirius grumbled. “It’s boring as all hell here.”

“Why are you here?” Remus yawned, rolling over slightly so he could look at Sirius while still snuggling under his blankets. “I could hate you forever, you know.”

“James kicked me out of the room,” Sirius reported sourly. “He’s furious. Are you going to hate me forever? I don’t think I’ve done enough to warrant eternal hatred.”

“Well,” Remus thought about holding up his fingers to count Sirius’ crimes, but couldn’t summon the energy, “you’ve nearly got someone killed, nearly outed the three of you as unregistered Animagi, nearly got all of us expelled, and broken your solemn Marauder oath to keep my secret. More importantly, you broke your word to me.”

Sirius scowled at the ground.

“You didn’t answer my question,” he said.

“Do you ever just admit when you’re wrong?” Remus let his eyes slide closed, suddenly very tired. “Have you ever apologized to anyone during your entire life?”

“I don’t apologize when I’m not sorry,” Sirius replied snappishly. “I’m not sorry Snivellus is a spying berk and he nearly got killed for sneaking around after us. I’m not sorry that nobody knows we’re Animagi. I’m not sorry that we aren’t expelled. And,” he spat with sudden venom, “I’m NOT sorry Potter is getting an award for services to the school! And he has the nerve to shout at me about it!”

“Imagine that,” Remus murmured, eyes still closed. “That wasn’t every crime I named, however. You aren’t off the hook yet, Mr. Padfoot.”

Sirius was silent for so long that Remus finally cracked an eye to make sure he hadn’t left. Sirius was staring at the ground, letting his hair swing forward to hide most of his face. What Remus could see of his face was set in a deep frown.

“You do of course realize,” Remus said in an entirely too reasonable voice, “that if it got out that I was a werewolf and I had nearly eaten a student, I’d be expelled immediately. Probably ruin the rest of my life as well, couldn’t get a job and such.”

“You do realize that if it gets out I’m sleeping with you I’ll be just as fucked,” Sirius snarled. “You aren’t the only martyr here, Mr. Moony.”

“If I were in your position, I’d be very careful about starting a contest over who’s got the most to lose here,” Remus said calmly. “I’ll still be a werewolf no matter what. Play your cards right, and I’ll be very willing to remove the threat of others finding out you spend one out of three nights in my bed.”

Sirius flinched a little.

“Don’t,” he said, unclear whether he meant ‘don’t threaten me’ or ‘don’t break up with me’.

“I’ve got nothing but time, Sirius,” Remus shrugged, rolling over to put his back to Sirius, not seeing Sirius flinch again at the rare use of his first name. “Unless I’m sent home in disgrace, that is. Sit there glaring at the floor as long as you like.”

After a few minutes, Remus heard the scrape of a chair and supposed that Sirius was leaving, but then felt a weight sink down on the edge of the bed. A hand tugged his shoulder until he rolled back towards Sirius, aided by the slope of the mattress.

“Don’t,” Sirius said again, looking down at the sheets beside him rather than Remus’ face. Remus glanced down to see Sirius moving his hand against the bed, making helpless little circles with his fingertips, as if he were trying to reach for Remus’ hand without moving. Remus ignored it.

“If you’ve got something to say, Sirius,” Remus used his name again deliberately, watching the wince dispassionately, “you’d better say it.”

“Snivel…Snape probably already knew,” Sirius said.

“No excuse,” Remus pronounced.

“I only meant to scare him,” Sirius tried again. “So he’d leave us alone.”

“No,” Remus said.

“I hadn’t…” a small line of concentration appeared between Sirius’ eyebrows. “I didn’t mean for him to find out about you for sure.”

“Not good enough.”

“I…” Sirius’ mouth tightened. “If you get sent home I will consider it as a direct result of an event which I instigated unremorsefully.”

“You nearly had it until that last word,” Remus clucked his tongue. “If you have ever meant any affectionate utterance that you’ve made to me, you had better say it.”

Sirius pursed his lips.

“Right. Now.”

“I’m sorry I broke my promise to you.”

The words would have been inaudible to a non-werewolf, which Remus found highly ironic, but he moved one hand to brush fingers with Sirius at last. Sirius’ expression didn’t change, but he seized Remus’ fingers tightly, his hand very cold.

“Just tell me what you want me to do,” Sirius mumbled.

“Think it’s just that easy, don’t you?” Remus asked. “Think you can pay your way out of this like everything else? An attitude worthy of the heir to the noble and most ancient house of Black.”

Sirius’ grip on Remus’ hand tightened and his jaw clenched, but he took the jab. Remus was impressed; the same insult had nearly earned Sirius’ cousin an Unforgivable last fall.

“Name your terms,” he said after a moment.

“I’ll have to think about it,” Remus yawned delicately. “I’m far too tired to come up with impossible demands just this moment. There’s going to be loads of chocolate involved, that’s for bloody sure. And sexual favors out the…well, lots of those as well.”

Remus squeezed Sirius’ hand a final time before pulling it back under the blanket and snuggling back down into the pillows, intending to sleep for the rest of the day or until he could work up some proper ire, whichever came first.

After a moment, it became apparent that Sirius was not going anywhere.

“Go away,” Remus commanded. “Be prepared to grovel when I wake up.”

“Say you won’t give me the freeze, like that time in Third Year.”

If Remus’ eyes had been open, he would have rolled them at Sirius’ childish demand that he had no business making.

“I’m not going to stop speaking to you again,” he said instead. “It’s far more fun to make your life miserable for a while. Go work on your atonement and let me sleep.”

“What do you want me to do?” Sirius asked suspiciously.

“You’re clever enough to be a dog when you want,” Remus sighed, almost asleep. “Figure it out.”

* * * * * *

When Remus was thinking more clearly that night on the way back to the dormitory, he reasoned that he ought to stay angry at Sirius for at least until the next full moon, or he would never learn anything from all of this.

In the room, Remus stretched the kinks out of his neck and wondered idly why his bed hangings were drawn. He stepped closer and pulled a hanging aside, glancing over what lay on his bed calmly.

Sirius raised an eyebrow at him, sprawled across his pillows, wearing only the chocolate icing across his chest.

It spelled out ‘Remus Lupin is my Supreme Deity’, and looked to be dark chocolate, all of which Remus found highly acceptable.

“Close the curtain,” Sirius said shortly. “It’s cold.”

Remus allowed the hanging to swing closed behind him, telling himself that he was removing his robe and shirt only so that they didn’t get stained. He sat on his bed and leaned over to lick the top off the ‘R’ in ‘Remus’.

Dark orange chocolate, he noticed, impressed despite himself. Sirius had been very clever indeed.

“Three weeks, then,” he murmured, cutting off Sirius’ question with his lips.

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