Harry Potter, The Leader of this Merry Band

Title: The Leader of this Merry Band [Remus/Sirius/James]
Rating/Warnings: NC-17. Threesome obviously. A little dominance never hurt anybody.
Summary: James has completely lost control of this entire situation.
AN: For the Fantasy Fest, musesfool wanted Post-quidditch Remus/Sirius/James with Remus giving orders, post-trick.

The Leader of this Merry Band

“I can’t understand,” James blew the damp hair out of his eyes, “why you won’t just shower with the rest of us. It’s stupid!”

“I can shower just as easily in the Tower as I can down there,” Sirius pointed out, squelching down the hall in his muddy trainers, apparently unconcerned about the nasty tracks he was leaving. “You said I shouldn’t anyway after the incident with the wanking and the concussion…damn slippery tiles…”

“Didn’t bother you for months afterwards,” James cut him off, “so don’t feed me that shit. It’s about Remus, isn’t it?”

“He doesn’t like me showering with other people,” Sirius related, as though it were a perfectly normal thing for Hogwarts’ premier exhibitionist to say.

“Does he like it better when you smell like a used sock?” James inquired, gritting his teeth as the conversation took a turn that had become familiar lately.

“Remus thinks it’s a reasonable alternative.”

“Can you hear yourself?” James stopped to glare at his best mate, mimicking him meanly. “Remus doesn’t like and Remus thinks and Remus wants…what’s WRONG with you?!”

“Nothing,” Sirius crossed his arms stubbornly. James refrained from wringing his neck to make him see reason.

“Sirius, listen, this isn’t normal, the way he’s controlling you! I don’t like it!”

“Don’t like it?” The cold edge in Sirius’ voice brought James up short. “Did you like it better when he hated me? When he wouldn’t be in the same room with me? Because I DIDN’T!”

“Sirius…” James tried again, but Sirius was having none of it, and the conversation died out for the rest of the way back to the dormitory. When they reached the doorway, Sirius paused to kick off his trainers, the words ‘Remus doesn’t want me tracking mud in the room’ hanging unspoken in the air.

Inside, Remus was sprawled on his bed with an open book across his lap. James didn’t miss the way Remus’ fingers tightened around the book, then relaxed when he saw who it was. Setting his broom carefully against the wall, James narrowed his eyes at the way Sirius trotted over to Remus right away, whispering something that made the other boy smile indulgently while keeping his muddy hands carefully at his side.

“Fine, he’s seen your lack of hygiene,” James said, with more sharpness than was strictly necessary, “now will you please go shower? I can smell you over here!”

Sirius looked back at James in irritation, then took a purposely long time stripping off his clothes. He left them in a sodden heap beside his bed before snatching up a towel and striding from the room. He stuck out his tongue at James on the way past.

James took a moment to collect his temper before walking over to Remus’ bed, where the other boy had already gone back to his book.

“Something you want?” Remus asked without looking up.

“This thing with Sirius,” James crossed his arms and put on his best I’m the Leader of This Merry Band expression, “it’s gone on long enough, Remus. It’s got to end.”

“Does it?” Remus murmured, turning a page. “What thing are we talking about?”

“You know damn well what thing,” James refused to be phased by Remus’ neutral demeanor. “Every word out of his mouth is ‘Remus says this’ and ‘Remus wants that’! He’s acting like he hasn’t got a brain of his own!”

“As opposed,” Remus finally did look up, and James fought the urge to back up a step, “to when he was acting like he hadn’t got a brain at all?”

“Dammit, stop acting like nothing’s wrong!” James didn’t try to stop his voice from rising, resorting to an attempt to unsettle Remus by sheer volume. “You’re controlling everything he does, and I’ve had enough! You’re going to forgive him, you wanker, so things can go back to normal!”

Remus burst out laughing, and that was when James snapped.

Roaring something incoherent, James knocked the book from Remus’ hands and launched himself at the other boy, seizing the front of his shirt and intending to bang his skull against the headboard until he stopped being so goddamned reasonable.

The next thing he knew, he had been flipped over and was flat on his back, pinned under Remus on the bed in what a pessimist might call a completely helpless position.

“So long as you’re just laying there,” Remus was still sounding completely reasonable, that bastard, “you might as well have a good listen. Do you know why Sirius is a dog Animagus?”

“Because dogs are loud,” James snarled, struggling, “and have lots of hair and can lick their own balls! Geroff me, you wankstain!”

“Dogs have masters,” Remus informed him. “Moreover, dogs want masters, they like them, they actively seek them out. It’s what makes them dogs instead of wolves, or cats, or hippogriffs or anything else that can lick its own balls.”

“What’s that got to do with Sirius?” James tried to get his feet under him to throw Remus off, but the squishiness of the bedclothes was working against him. Suddenly the door slammed open behind them, and James twisted his neck to see Sirius dripping in the doorway, looking uncertain.

“Remus…” he started, and James finally shoved Remus off in a burst of frustration. Remus settled back down next to him, unperturbed.

“Just sit there,” he ordered quietly, “and you might learn something. Sirius, come here a minute.”

Pulling his towel from his hips to rub the water from his hair, Sirius trotted over readily. His lack of modesty was nothing new to James, who had once made a bet with him to see who could go the longest without wearing trousers. James would have won too, if they hadn’t been learning the unfortunately named Blowing Charms that week. He was only now starting to shake off the nickname ‘Marilyn’.

“I’ll get your shirt wet,” Sirius was saying to Remus, voice muffled by the towel, but Remus shrugged and reached up to tug the towel off him. Without further argument, Sirius allowed himself to be pulled down onto the bed and settled onto Remus’ chest. As Remus slid fingers into his wet hair and rubbed his scalp, Sirius regarded James with half-open eyes. “Is he joining us, then?”

“Why’re you asking him instead of me?” James demanded, irritated by the way that after everything else, the sight of a naked Sirius tangled up with Remus was still turning him on.

“I already know what your answer is,” Sirius replied, snaking a hand down to brush the bulge in James’ trousers.

“Fuck you both,” James snarled at their knowing expressions, swinging his legs off the bed to go, but Sirius caught at his shirt with the same hand and pulled at him.

“Stay,” Sirius slid off Remus towards James to get more leverage and pulled harder.

“Yes, do stay,” Remus added, and the raise of his eyebrow made James want to rip it off. “You can even be in charge if you want.” He leaned over Sirius and got a hold on James shirt beside Sirius’, but where Sirius’ tugs had been imploring, Remus’ one sharp pull was all command.

“I don’t want…” James started as he let himself be moved against Sirius, meaning to say that he wasn’t jealous, he just wanted Sirius to act normal, but Sirius was pulling James’ arm across his waist and licking the hollow of James’ throat, and James’ thoughts went a bit hazy. Over Sirius’ shoulder, James could see Remus undoing the buttons of his shirt as he watched.

Figuring he could at least give Sirius some dignity back while he was actually present, James looked Remus right in the eye while he rolled over onto his back so that Sirius was on top. Taking advantage of the position, Sirius sat up, rolling his hips into James’ as he reached down to rid James of his own shirt. As soon as the shirt was gone, however, Sirius rolled them right back over, settling James firmly on top of him and sighing with pleasure into James’ shoulder.

Remus gave a dry chuckle, and James looked up angrily to find that knowing expression back in full force. Anger crackling along the edges of his lust, James freed a hand to yank Remus over by the hair for a kiss, hard enough that the other boy hissed against his mouth before parting his lips.

Edging over a bit so that he was pressed tightly in between James and Remus, Sirius leaned a cheek against Remus’ bare chest and wriggled against both of them happily. Breaking the kiss, Remus looked down at Sirius and murmured ‘Mine’ before bending his head to sink his teeth into the curve where Sirius’ neck slid into his shoulder.

James scowled at Remus’ significant look. Not like he had missed the way Sirius arched into Remus even as his hands tightened on James, keening a high noise of need.

“Stop it,” James ordered.

“Ask him if he wants me to,” Remus replied smoothly, still looking at James while he ran his tongue over the bite mark.

“You fucker…” James started. He reached over to shove Remus, but Remus caught his wrist and just held it.

“What’s going on?” Sirius asked muzzily, looking between Remus and James. “Are we in a fight?”

“James thinks,” Remus moved his mouth from Sirius’ shoulder up to his ear, making him shiver, “that you’re trying to earn my forgiveness.”

“What?” Sirius blinked at James, pupils wide from arousal. “Don’t be a twit, Prongs, Moony forgave me weeks ago.”

Realization washed over James in a cold wave as he took in Sirius’ position underneath and between himself and Remus, the way Sirius had pulled James’ arms possessively around his waist.

“What’d you think I was a dog Animagus for, so I could lick my balls?” Sirius asked, and James felt the urge to punch somebody returning, relieved to be on familiar ground. He jerked his wrist angrily out of Remus’ grip.

“Don’t look so put out, James,” Remus patted his shoulder comfortingly, “turns out Sirius was a big nelly bottom the entire time. Say ‘bad dog!’ in a commanding tone and he’s all yours.”

“But I…” James struggled to absorb this sudden insight into his best mate’s sexual kinks, “…I thought…you…”

“Could there be less blathering,” Sirius wanted to know, “and more buggering me?”

“Don’t see why not,” Remus laughed softly, lowering a hand to stroke Sirius’ erection slowly. “Prongs, you want the honors? There’s some lube in the drawer behind you.”

Feeling a bit numb, James turned to the bedside table behind him and rummaged through the drawer to turn up a mostly used tube of lubricant. Judging by the size of the tube, Sirius had been a big nelly bottom for quite some time now.

Before he could turn back around completely, Sirius’ and Remus’ hands were at his waist, undoing his trousers and pushing them out of the way, revealing that James’ cock was not at all confused about the proceedings. Before he could say more than ‘oh god’, James was watching Remus slide several fingers into Sirius while James fisted himself slick.

“What are you waiting for, summer holidays?” Sirius panted, and that was all the encouragement James needed to seize Sirius’ hips and lift them up so he could press his cock inside. He’d lost track of what exactly Remus was doing, but wasn’t giving it much thought as he drew back a little and plunged even deeper inside Sirius. Thighs spread wide enough that it couldn’t possibly be very comfortable, Sirius wrapped his legs around James and dug his heels into the small of James’ back to urge him closer.

And then suddenly James knew exactly where Remus was because slick fingers were probing his own arse.

“Remus!” James tried to protest and twist away, but Sirius’ legs were holding him tightly in place and Remus was pressing into his back, making escape impossible. “Remus, don’t!”

“Shut up, you girl,” Sirius said casually, jerking his hips up to burying James deeper, “you’ll love it.”

James was not going to love it if he could help it, but there was nothing he could really do since the other boys had him by the bits in a not-so-metaphorical manner. The only thing he could do was keep thrusting into Sirius as Remus stretched him, and then the fingers disappeared and James had just enough time to think The Potter arse is a temple not a playground before Remus’ cock was working inside him in a series of brutal thrusts.

Gasping, James blinked back tears and concentrated on staring down at Sirius underneath him. Flushed and hair strewn over the pillows, Sirius looked like some sort of deranged Lizard King hedonist. He had a hand at his cock, but he was squeezing its base rather than stroking it as he stared up at James open-mouthed, as if watching James get fucked was his favorite fantasy come true and he wanted it to last as long as possible.

Probably is, James snarled, giving a sharp thrust as if it would punish Sirius somehow. He wouldn’t put it past Sirius at all to have fantasies about watching Remus fuck him using James, and that was just about what was happening as Remus’ rhythm overpowered James’, driving him into Sirius at a pace that was making James’ head spin.

“Damned if I come before you!” James bared his teeth at Sirius and wrapped a hand around Sirius’ to make him stroke himself, hard and fast, the push of James’ hips forcing Sirius’ cock into their hands.

“Come,” Remus rasped next to James’ ear, and he wasn’t sure whether Remus was ordering him or Sirius, but both of them obeyed, Sirius spilling over both their hands and his stomach, and the only thing holding James up was Remus’ bruising hands on his hips, keeping James in place while he finished himself off.

Things were a bit tangled for a few minutes, and when James possessed the faculties to process his position, he found Sirius had worked his way in between James and Remus again somehow, Remus leaning over to kiss him lazily. James’ arm was draped over Sirius’ hip, and he had no doubts about who had put it there.

“My arse hurts,” he announced peevishly, and Remus and Sirius pulled apart just enough to look over at him.

“Want us to kiss it better?” Sirius asked. He and Remus exchanged a glance that James did not like the look of one bit.

“That’s not what I…” James tried to back away, but the other two caught his arms and pulled him over into the middle, and as they were flipping him onto his stomach, James began to wonder when exactly he had completely lost control of this entire situation.

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