DBSK, My Universe, Your Ocean

Title: My Universe, Your Ocean [Yunho/Jaejoong]
Rating/Warnings: PG for Changmin knowing everything
Summary: Jaejoong asks Yunho a question.
AN: Title from the Rurutia song, 僕の宇宙君の海.

My Universe, Your Ocean

“Do you like boys?” Jaejoong asks, startling Yunho so badly that he nearly drops his bowl of rice. They’re the only two still in the kitchen, the others having drifted off to practice or sleep. Yunho was late back from a last meeting and didn’t get to start eating dinner until the others had nearly finished.

“What?” Yunho asks, setting his bowl down in case there are other shocking statements coming. “Why do you ask?”

Jaejoong shrugs a shoulder, casual and unconcerned. “I just think it would be smarter, given our situation.”

He pushes himself gracefully out of his chair and saunters out of the room, leaving Yunho blinking in his wake.

The five of them haven’t been together long, and it’s the first personal question Jaejoong has asked, the first thing deeper than “What do you like for breakfast” or “Do you mind if I borrow your shirt,” and it unbalances Yunho as he struggles to have an answer over the next few days.

It’s been long enough, though, that Yunho understands ‘our situation’ to mean ‘being DBSK.’ Long enough that he can see what Jaejoong is saying is true, that while they continue to be in this situation, the only safe place to seek out affection is within the group. They’re too busy, too well-monitored for anything else.

He hasn’t thought about it until now, but he supposes that sexual tension will be the same way.

What Yunho isn’t sure about is whether Jaejoong was asking about Yunho himself, or just bringing up the topic so that it will come to Yunho’s attention, in the roundabout manner that Jaejoong sometimes uses to talk about things he doesn’t want to discuss directly. He tries to get a read on Jaejoong over the next few days while he chews on the question still, but Jaejoong’s eyes don’t tell him anything, deep like the ocean so that Yunho can’t see the bottom, and Yunho isn’t ready to bring up the conversation again yet.

He turns to Junsu instead. Not that Junsu usually has a lot of deep answers, but Junsu is close, a brother, and well-versed in the ways of the corporation. Junsu sits cross-legged on the end of Yunho’s bed, head tilted in concentration as he listens. He grins, insufferable, when Yunho finally bungles his way through the real question, and Yunho scowls at him.

“Such a face!” Junsu reaches over to flick Yunho between the eyes, making the wrinkles in his forehead flatten out in surprise. “You asked me for my help, remember? But I don’t know what help I can give you to figure it out. Do you like boys?”

“No,” Yunho says automatically, wondering why he couldn’t have just said that to Jaejoong. But something about the answer still itches under his skin. “At least, last I checked. I haven’t thought about anyone in a while, and, we’re under a lot of pressure, so, it makes you think weird things sometimes. But. I mean—“

“Why are you still explaining?” Junsu laughs, not seeming at all disconcerted by Yunho’s inability to give a yes or no answer. “Look, do you like girls?”

“Sure.” Yunho blinks. “You know that. You and I used to rate all the girls that came in as new trainees, remember?”

“Yeah,” Junsu’s smile softens, “but we haven’t done it in a long time.”

“We’ve been busy,” Yunho says. “It’s different. We’re DBSK now.”

“Yeah, we are, Leader-sshi.” Junsu leans over to kiss Yunho’s cheek. “So it is.”

Junsu slides off Yunho’s bed and trots off to start trouble after sitting still for so long, and Yunho sighs. It isn’t like he expected Junsu to have any deep answers anyway.

Yunho doesn’t have Yoochun entirely sussed out yet, but the only other option is Changmin and Yunho isn’t ready to either corrupt the baby already or else discover that he doesn’t have to, so Yoochun it is. He likes Yoochun enough, at any rate, more than enough, and if Yoochun is prone to bouts of homesickness and crying, Yunho doesn’t mind in exchange for the moments of quiet companionship he gets from Yoochun at other times.

“Can I talk to you?” Yunho asks, leaning into the practice room, and Yoochun’s fingers still on the piano keys, the soft melody dying away. Yunho waits to see Yoochun’s eyes before he can judge whether Yoochun’s mood is good enough for his questions. Yoochun’s eyes aren’t sad today, just curious, so Yunho comes in and sits next to him on the piano bench.

He should have started with Yoochun, maybe, Yunho realizes, since Yoochun and Jaejoong have become close the fastest, and his real question is about Jaejoong and not himself.

“I’m just not sure what Jaejoong’s after,” Yunho finishes his story, Yoochun’s dark eyes steady on him. “Has he said anything to you?”

“About you?” Yoochun’s eyes spark a little, making Yunho frown. “Or about boys?”

“I don’t know,” Yunho confesses, giving a frustrated sigh. “What has he said?”

“He’s working too much and not sleeping enough,” Yoochun shrugs a shoulder. “He’s worried he won’t be able to keep up. But he wants to. I think he’s happy.”

“That’s good.” Yunho feels a sort of pressure he hadn’t even realized he’d been carrying around lift off his chest.

“I think he wants to be happy with DBSK,” Yoochun finishes, making Yunho blink.

“Ah,” Yunho says after a second, understanding a little more. He eyes Yoochun, thinking. “What about you? Do you like boys?”

Yoochun flashes Yunho a crooked half-smile and puts his hands back on the piano keys. “Keep a secret?”

“Of course,” Yunho answers. Yoochun draws a light, half-familiar melody out of the piano.

“I like Junsu,” Yoochun confesses, voice shy but warm, and Yunho nods and thinks that if it’s like that, maybe that’d be okay.

“Of course you do,” says a voice from the doorway, and Yoochun and Yunho both whirl to find Changmin rolling his eyes at them. “Aish, you morons. You might want to close the door if you’re going to play secret confession.”

Yoochun’s cheeks turn furious scarlet. “Changmin-ah…”

“Don’t worry, my lips are sealed,” Changmin shrugs, pulling the door shut behind him as he comes into the room, and Yoochun’s shoulders slump in relief. “But you should tell him, because he’s at least twice the sap you are. And you,” Changmin turns to Yunho, “Jaejoong doesn’t care what you think about random boys, obviously. There’s only one reason he’d ask you anything like that.”

“You’re too young to know any of this,” Yunho scowls, but he eyes Changmin thoughtfully. “You don’t mind? This?”

“Too late for stupid questions like that.” Changmin meets Yunho’s gaze evenly, and Yunho struggles to reconcile this serious, adult-eyed young man with the teenager who fights Jaejoong for the front seat of the van. “What do they think is going to happen when five guys who spend every waking moment together share bedrooms too?”

“Far, far too young,” Yunho grumbles, while Yoochun cracks up at Yunho’s expression. “You know everything, and I still don’t know whether I like boys or not.”

The corners of Changmin’s smile are knowing and suggestive. “Who says you have to pick?”

So it is that Yoochun offers to switch rooms for the night, and Yunho is waiting on Jaejoong’s bed when Jaejoong comes in, hands damp from finishing the dishes.

“Sorry it took me so long to answer your question,” Yunho says without preamble, and Jaejoong pulls the door shut and crosses his arms to hear it. “I’m not used to you wanting to do things that are smart.”

Jaejoong comes just close enough to be barely within reach, eyes still the ocean. “I wasn’t asking because it was smart. And you still haven’t answered.”

“Good, me either.” Yunho holds his arms open, offering. “I don’t think I do like boys, no. But I think I might like you instead.”

The corner of Jaejoong’s mouth curls into a smile, and when he uncrosses his arms to take Yunho’s hand and let himself be pulled in, Yunho finds he can see the bottom of the ocean after all.

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  • By Chiharu, 2009.01.20 @ 6:27 pm

    Urg. I hope you know what little knowledge I have of DBSK are pretty much derived from these fics of yours. I’m too scared of antifans to go into that fandom ):

  • By Amande Darcy, 2009.05.07 @ 10:40 am

    as you i am a new fan of them …and i love the yunjae! i dont know why XD.it is sweet !!!

  • By Mousapelli, 2009.05.07 @ 1:06 pm

    Thank you! Glad you enjoyed.

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