JE, The Dangers of Puberty

Title: The Dangers of Puberty [Taiga/Uekusa]
Rating/Warnings: PG because Taiga has the puberties.
Summary: Uekusa is only trying to defend himself.
AN: Oh god, I should just be fired. On the March Shokuras, Taiga and Uekusa sing “Kizuna” and it’s gayer than a drag queen in springtime. PLEASE TELL ME SOMEBODY ELSE WROTE THIS PAIRING FIRST. TELL ME I’m NOT THE FIRST ONE D: D: D: D: D:

It’ll probably also help to understand that in Japanese, the zero pronoun means ‘i like it’ and ‘i like you’ are essentially the same sentences.

The Dangers of Puberty

Taiga is very pretty these days.

“So,” Taiga says silkily, turning from the Shokura practice schedule to look Uekusa in the eye, “you don’t find anything wrong with this?”

Very, very pretty. Especially when he’s annoyed. His eyes get kind of narrow and his cheekbones seem to sharpen, and his mouth sort of condenses into this cute little line and…

Uekusa swallows and reminds himself that if Taiga gets so much as a hint that Uekusa is thinking about how pretty he is, Taiga will kick him in the shin. Taiga’s legs are like five miles long now, so it hurts like hell when he really pulls back and aims.

“I like ‘Kizuna,’” Uekusa says instead, all the while thinking to himself not so pretty, he’s not so pretty, stop staring

“And last filming it was ‘Ai Ai Gasa.’” Taiga’s eyes narrow even more, and really, Uekusa’s wondering just how narrow they can get since Taiga’s, you know, Japanese and all.

“I like that song too,” Uekusa says, trying to buy himself some time. Maybe somebody will save him, he thinks, but the rest of the juniors mill about around them, checking the schedule as if nothing’s wrong. Anderson can usually be counted on, but he’s busy arguing with Shintarou over whether anybody can lick their own elbow or not. Traitors, Uekusa thinks.

“Don’t play dumb!” Taiga snaps. His eyes flash, they actually flash, and Uekusa bites back a whimper because he thought that only happened in anime. “They keep giving us love songs together. Duet love songs. You don’t think that’s weird?”

“We’re popular,” Uekusa hedges. “It’s nice.” Across the room, Uekusa manages to catch Koyama-kun’s eye and makes what he hopes is a subtle yet pleading face. Koyama-kun will save him! Koyama-kun’s the best senpai ever!

Koyama-kun waves back cheerfully.

“Are you telling me, you think this is all totally normal?” Taiga wants to know. He’s leaning closer, definitely gearing up to abuse Uekusa’s shins some more, along with who knows what else.

Clearly no help is coming, and Uekusa will have to fend for himself.

“Of course it isn’t normal, we’re jyannis,” Uekusa says.

“Yeah, but…” Taiga starts, but Uekusa interrupts him.

“Taiga-chan,” Uekusa widens his eyes and gives Taiga a sad, sad face. “Are you saying you don’t want to sing duets with me anymore?”

“N-no.” Taiga frowns, then frowns harder when Uekusa ups the look a few notches. “I…no, I just…”

“Because I like singing duets with Taiga-chan,” Uekusa goes on, thinking that he could really nail it if he could just get a blush going, so he thinks about Taiga’s long legs and sharp cheekbones and the way his hair is starting to brush his collar bones, and yeah, there it goes, perfect. “You like it, right?”

“I like it,” Taiga responds immediately, and then his words seem to catch up to his brain and he blushes a little himself. “I mean, the song, I like…” Taiga stops himself with a frustrated noise, flustered.

“Yay!” Uekusa gives a little cheer. “It’s all solved then!”

“Wait,” Taiga says, shaking his head as if to clear it, “wait, wait, you didn’t solve anything, all you did was…”

And then Uekusa leans up to kiss Taiga’s sharp, pretty cheekbone, because Shintarou’s been complaining lately about Uekusa getting a little too pretty himself, and the only way to deal with situations like this, he’s learned, is to fight fire with fire.

It’s all in the name of self-preservation, he tells himself.

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