Kis-My-Ft2, Incriminating Evidence

Title: Incriminating Evidence [Kitayama, Fujigaya]
Rating/Warnings: PG
Summary: Kitayama gets tabloided again; Fujigaya isn’t amused.
AN: Written for Shiritori. I’ve seen the pictures, and they really don’t look that much like Mitsu, and he really is getting getting pranked while he’s asleep in them, if it is him.

Incriminating Evidence

“You would have to be the one,” Fujigaya growled, thumbing at his phone harder than was strictly necessary.

“The one who what?” Senga wanted to know, leaning in, eyes going wide when he saw the picture on Fujigaya’s phone. “Oh!”

“Shit is that Kitamitsu with some chick?” Nikaido whooped, squinting without his glasses. “Who is that?”

“Koki says it’s Kuroki Meisa,” Fujigaya tilted the phone this way and that, “but I’m not seeing it.”

It didn’t stop Nikaido from cracking up. “Goddamn, Taipi, you really are last, aren’t you?”

“Ryosuke and I tried to do an intervention, but it was hopeless,” Senga said, and then noticed Fujigaya glaring at him. “Aw, don’t worry! It’s not that weird these days! Nika, quit it!” He elbowed Nikaido sharply, but it only made Nikaido laugh harder. “Those are pretty awful pictures anyway, he’s totally asleep and getting pranked! Leader wouldn’t cheat on us like that.”

“That’s really not what he’s mad about, you know,” put in a sleep-thick voice from the couch.

“He’s not?” Senga blinked, looking from Fujigaya to Kitayama and back again. Fujigaya glared at his phone harder, refusing to give Kitayama the satisfaction of turning around.

“He’s pissed they won’t do a scandal about him.” Kitayama gave a loud yawn, and Fujigaya dropped his phone before he broke it.

Nikaido and Senga both scrutinized Fujigaya a few seconds, until Fujigaya snapped a “What?!”

“I guess it is pretty unbelievable, isn’t it,” Senga sighed while Nikaido just shook his head sadly. “Even just for promotions.”

“Will you get the hell out of here!” Fujigaya hollered, standing up and shoving them towards the door. “Go promote your faces stuck in a train door or something!” He gave them a last shove and slammed the door shut, ignoring their whines that it wouldn’t be call for aaaaaages. He locked it for good measure. “And that’s not what I’m pissed about, for your information.”

Kitayama had rolled over onto his back in the meantime, stretching slowly, and Fujigaya willed himself not to pay any attention to the strip of tanned, muscled stomach that was showing, or its teasing trail of hair.

“Oh? Well, do tell then, Taisuke.” Kitayama said the last word like a teasing caress, and Fujigaya vowed to strangle Totsuka next chance he got for teaching Kitayama that trick.

“I’d rather you didn’t give our group that sort of reputation,” Fujigaya answered stiffly, enough truth in it to hopefully show in his face. “You all can laugh about it, but we’re not Arashi, we’re not even KAT-TUN. We’re not so popular we should take stupid chances.”

“You think me banging Akanishi’s wife is a bit past the line?” Kitayama smirked, eyeing him.

“I think I wouldn’t be photographed with even one of his shirts right now,” Fujigaya said with obvious distaste.

“See, now that I do believe.” Kitayama laughed, a rumble low in his throat. “You really can’t lie for shit, you know that? But don’t stop trying, since I like that cute side of you, even if we can’t use you for scandalous promotions. C’mon,” he made a cat’s pawing motion, “let me see at least.”

Reaching for his phone where he’d dropped it on the table, Fujigaya handed it over. He slapped at Kitayama’s bare feet until Kitayama drew them up enough for Fujigaya to sit.

“Mn, not my best side. While I was asleep, huh?” Kitayama’s expression didn’t change but there was a flicker of something in his eyes that made Fujigaya wonder which friend was now on Kitayama’s entirely unpleasant shit list. “Looks like it’ll be home parties for a bit.” He shut the phone, but held it just out of Fujigaya’s reach. “You gonna put out for me, cherry-san?”

“What makes you think I wouldn’t leak even worse photos?” Fujigaya demanded snappishly. He made another grab for the phone, but it only wedged him between Kitayama and the back of the couch, Kitayama grabbing his arm and dragging him closer.

“The fact that you’d be in them with me?” Kitayama laughed that same low laugh. It felt just as good as it sounded now that Fujigaya was pressed against his side to feel it. “Can you imagine if our fans really did get something like that?”

“They’d throw us a wedding at Dome,” Fujigaya growled, giving up on the phone as too much effort. He went limp against Kitayama’s chest and closed his eyes, lazy. “And I’d have to kill myself.”

“Guess you better keep this safe, then,” Kitayama murmured. Fujigaya tensed at the touch to his butt, but relaxed when Kitayama just slid the phone into his back pocket. “Although it would probably save me the sleazy girl promotions and you getting so jealous over them? At the least it would stop Ken-chan plotting with your brother to get you deflowered.”

“Just between us, you swore,” Fujigaya warned, lifting his head to glare for emphasis. “If you breathe a word to Ken-chan, you’ll wish you got off as lucky as Kuroki Meisa.”

“I’m not ready for marriage, I supposed,” Kitayama said, then added thoughtfully, “ah, but Dome, though. I’m sure Tono would officiate. Wedding Party has a nice tour name ring to it, doesn’t it?”

Fujigaya really had no choice but to kiss him at that point, just to shut him up.

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